Author: :Shiyara Dassanayake
PCC | Attorney- at – Law | Life Coach | Corporate Trainer | NLP Practitioner
In a world where results are relentlessly pursued and agility is demanded, it is easy to overlook the quiet compass that steers the most enduring success—Emotional Intelligence (EI). Far beyond being just a buzzword, EI is emerging as the bedrock of impactful leadership, resilient relationships, and authentic personal development.
My recent exploration of emotional intelligence has revealed its practical power in everyday leadership and connection. Rather than an abstract ideal, EI is about tuning into what we feel inside and understanding how those feelings shape our interactions.
Emotional intelligence means recognizing emotions as they arise, naming them, and choosing how to respond thoughtfully instead of reacting impulsively or withdrawing. This is not about maintaining perfect composure but about increasing self-awareness and intentionality.
This shows up in moments such as:
- Pausing before responding to a challenging email
- Noticing when a colleague feels uneasy and addressing it with empathy
- Catching yourself before frustration affects your tone or decisions
These moments, though small, accumulate over time to influence trust, influence, and effectiveness—both personally and professionally.
Why Emotional Intelligence Matters
For those leading, mentoring, or working closely with others, emotional intelligence is fundamental. Understanding your own emotional triggers helps you remain steady under pressure, while reading subtle cues from others allows you to respond with insight and compassion.
Building emotional intelligence begins with simple questions:
- What emotion am I experiencing right now?
- What caused this feeling?
- What might be underlying the other person’s behavior?
- How can I choose my response intentionally?
Developing this awareness is like strengthening a muscle—it improves with practice and patience.
Practicing the Inner Compass
One practical exercise I have found valuable is:
Name it to tame it
When a strong emotion arises—such as frustration or anxiety—pause to silently label it: “I am feeling frustrated,” or “I feel pressured.”
This naming creates space between the feeling and your reaction, allowing you to respond more thoughtfully. Though it does not remove the emotion, it empowers you to manage it constructively and can change the outcome of conversations or decisions.
Exploring Further Insights
For a deeper dive, watch this video where Daniel Goleman, a pioneer in emotional intelligence research, outlines the 12 key traits emotionally intelligent people share. He emphasizes that these traits are learnable and developable over time.
Whether you are beginning to explore Emotional Intelligence or looking to deepen your practice, Daniel Goleman’s insights highlight EI as an essential skill for growth, connection, and lasting impact—rooted in awareness from within
